poem (i’m giving it a try)

so many questions
so little answers
trying to hard to find the right one
I’m lying in the dark
wondering who I am
and what to do
I’m trying to hear the beat
my special beat
the beat of my heart!
sometimes I just don’t hear it
because it just doesn’t seem to be there anymore :s
is it lost or just stopped?
maybe I should just stop looking
looking for the thing that isn’t there
someone nice who doesn’t judge!
no matter how hard I try
I’ll never be someone special
in someone else’s heart :s

magigian
xxx

just wondering…

hi,
I was just wondering if you really know the people who are in your life and say that they like you and stuff..
sometimes you can be totally wrong because you put your trust and friendliness into a friendship and they just spit you out like you totally mean nothing to you!!!
it’s a stupid thing really :s but it makes me wonder about life and the people in it!

I’m not saying that getting comment is a bad thing but there’s a difference between just comment and calling someone names like slut and stuff..
it’s normal for me to be friendly to new people in my life but sometimes some of them aren’t even worth the friendliness!! :s
it’s sad but it’s true! if they hate you over something small like freaking out over something than they are definitely not worth some friendliness!!
the people that are truely in my life and a support are only tree people and it’s sad because I know so many people! :s
sometimes you just have to think about your life and the people that you know and if they are being true to you!!
this is it for now
peace out
magigian
x-x-x

do you really know someone???

Sometimes I really wonder if you really know someone???
your friends for example!
You are there for them when they feel bad and when they need a talk and stuff but when you feel bad or you have a need for a chat you can’t reach them or they don’t really have time!!
It’s in times like that that you kind of get to know your REAL friends!!
you know, sometimes, you just want to know you actually can count on your friend and know that they are your BFFL!
That’s just one of the things you totally want to be sure of in your life!
There are all sorts of things that you just want to know and be sure of because it’s the things you rely on and stuff…
IF you have friends and they are there for you and stuff at the end of the day you kind of wonder if your friendship is the real thing!!

You’ll never know for sure!!

Peace out
magigian
xxx-xxx

some stuff…

hey,
well to be honest I’ve been doing some thinking lately and I must admit that it’s a tough world and people will alway judge the ones who they think are “weird” but how do they know that they aren’t “weird” to anyone else??
do you ever stop to think about that?? because no matter what it’s always out there… the judging and the picking on each other…
and the first reason people might pick on someone else is because they are ‘fat’ or they don’t fit in or whatever..
well you know I just think that’s total bullshit I mean you can be ‘fat’ and still fit in or you can be different but at least you’re alive and you’re not hiding who you are and wanna be!!!
look at me for example I mean I am a little fat and I like daniel bedingfield his music and obviously that makes me ‘weird’ but you know I would rather be who I am then pretend to be someone I totally am NOT!!!
what do you think? just let me know??

see you next blog
bye
magigian
xxx

another blog..

hey you guys,
well I must admit that I’m out of blog titles but I’m just going to write another one anyways..
to be honest I don’t know where to start with this blog.. there is so much I’d like to talk about but I can’t talk about it all at once right :p
ok, let’s talk about what’s important to me!
MUSIC
more importantly Daniel Bedingfield! he’s a great singer and I think it’s a shame that he’s not really performing anymore.. because I totally miss him!!!!
but even though I miss his I’m getting to know new music every day! I won’t EVER forget him but I just want music in my life!
because without one note I don’t think I’ll get through the day!!!
OK that probably will sound totally insane but I have the music bug in me to want to listen to some stuff every single day!! and it’s the same with movies but that’s another blog :p
about Daniel Bedingfield, I’ve been a fan for quite some time now and he’s great and even though he’s kind of taking a break from music now I’ll always like him!! I try to listen to his CD’s at least 4 times a week
OK, I admit it’s insane but I just believe in him and that’s important and he’s music helped me through some stuff…
so this is it I mean my musicphobia that is! I’m addicted to music and singing a bit too… there is so many great music out there and it’s important that everyone has his or her taste in music!!

until another blog… :p
Take care

Magigian
xxx

stuff..

hey you bloggers,
Maybe no one is ever going to read this but the thing is I need to get some stuff out of my system!
euhm, there is so much stuff in my head.. it’s weird but I just keep thinking about stuff but the thing is that I don’t really seem to find the right answers or just NO answers..
it’s all weird because I don’t really get it!!
I just don’t get the fact why that I just keep thinking about stuff like ‘do people like me?’ or ‘am I ok?’
it’s just insane, because I know that some people like me and some don’t and I kind of know that I’m ok but I just want people to confirm it!!
why? I don’t really get I but I just need it!
maybe it’s because I don’t really have many ‘REAL’ friends and I just kind of want to fit in and stuff…

you know, maybe I just need to stop thinking so much! it’s not good and it has no use because it will always be that people don’t like me or whatever…

if someone ever reads this, can you just let me know what you think?
thanks a lot
greets
magigian
xxx

i’m looking for someone to read my story!

hey!
I’ve written a story and now I’m looking for some nice people who want to read it!
I know it’s a long shot posting it here and asking and stuff but I really need for someone to read it so I have some idea if i’m good at it or not!!!
euhm.. I’m just going to hope that someone wants to read it when he or she is reading thing.
just give a shout out here and we’ll talk some more after that!
thanks
bye
magigian
xxx

i feel quite alright!

hey all you bloggers out there
this is me reporting an update on how i feel and stuff!
and it’s weird to admit it but i feel quite alright!! I met this great guy and he is totally sweet and stuff and I think i love him!
ok maybe this is to soon to say or something since we’re not so long together but I think this could be ‘the real thing’!!
why i don’t quite know but i feel ok when I’m around him and he gets me! my freaking out episodes and stuff and that’s nice because no other guy i know can actually understand them!!
I really feel good right now! I’m glad I met him and i don’t feel so weird like i used to!!
hopefully it may last a long time! that would be totally great!!

take care
peace out!
xxx

Heath Ledger dead :(

Heath Ledger (28) was found dead in his appartment on tuesday (22/1/08) by his housekeeper!
he was to young to die and I didn’t see all of his movies!!
which is a total shame!
he was a good actor! my favorite movie with him is ‘10 things I hate about you’
I will surely miss him!! it wasn’t meant to be!! he died too young!!

Heath Ledger 1979 – 2008

xx

can you fall in love TO soon?

hey,
I was just wondering! can you fall in love to soon?
I mean is there a thing as love at first sight or something??
you can like someone from the first time you meet or hear them but is it to soon to like them already then? because what’s going to happen a few weeks later you’ll never know!!
it can all be to quickly and someone can break your heart! (again)!
maybe love is just for the people who are willing to take a chance and don’t look back on it unless their heart gets chattered into a million pieces!!
but how can you survive that everytime you decide to put your heart in something??

it’s all just so stupid! you put your heart in something because you think that it’s the best thing to do and then in the end your heart always gets the most kicks and wounds!! :’(
that’s the sadest thing about love! your heart always suffers with you!!
ok i admit maybe it’s cliché what i’m saying but it’s true!!
i think never put your heart in somethng you are’n sure of!! it only makes it hearder when something bad happens!!

maybe i’m just a fool to put trust in love but you can never know on beforehand if it’s for real or not!!

magigian
xxx